It is 3 months into the year 2012 and what a weird year it has been. I started the journey that is my personal training career and has been very emotional, then again when is my life not? Along with that I have been working on increasing my muscular strength and size. That has been a huge challenge. I have been WAY more than I can afford sometimes, but I have made some gains. I am still rather lean but have a little more lean muscle on my shoulders and more size in my glutes, quads, and hams. I am still in the "fluffy" phase but still appear to be thin. No complaints here.
I have spent the past few months trying to build my clientele. I have been fortunate enough to gain a few permanent clients and worked with a few people who could only afford a smaller training package. I am sure this is normal or maybe I am just not doing a good enough job. It is very difficult to remain positive while you are just starting out. There are a lot of ups and downs and I second guess my self quite a bit. I feel like I have gained all of this knowledge but sometimes I just feel lost. Today is definitely one of those days. I finally got a fairly large paycheck. Probably one of the biggest I have received outside of modeling. It felt good but I know it won't be consistent at least for a bit. I passed up a job at the Logan Square Theatre because I need to fully focus on this. I do miss that instant cash from bartending but the hours are not much to be desired!
On a side note I have been thinking about my actions and feelings lately. It has made me think a bit more about how I handle my life and decisions. I have spent so much time trying to appease everyone, seeking some sense of gratitude or appreciation. I feel like I have lost a sense in trying to make myself happy. I over achieve, I try to help too much, and then I feel upset because no one says Thanks so much! or The place looks great...or maybe my effort will show how much I care and they return the effort back. It hasn't been working, so clearly I am not satisfied with it. My solution, and the obvious way normal people go about it, is to be more selfish. Stop caring about trying to "impress" or get some sort of thanks, do things for you. Go out of your way to make yourself feel better and you will not be let down in the long run.
I have been thinking about all this lately, and fitness, nutriton, mental alike, its relevant to health and happiness. You create and destroy your own well being and happiness, so take care of it.
That is all.
Goals for the rest of the year...up and perfect my Olympic Lift maxes, and eventually compete in Figure. When my size is right of course. Til then.
Faretheewell.
I have spent the past few months trying to build my clientele. I have been fortunate enough to gain a few permanent clients and worked with a few people who could only afford a smaller training package. I am sure this is normal or maybe I am just not doing a good enough job. It is very difficult to remain positive while you are just starting out. There are a lot of ups and downs and I second guess my self quite a bit. I feel like I have gained all of this knowledge but sometimes I just feel lost. Today is definitely one of those days. I finally got a fairly large paycheck. Probably one of the biggest I have received outside of modeling. It felt good but I know it won't be consistent at least for a bit. I passed up a job at the Logan Square Theatre because I need to fully focus on this. I do miss that instant cash from bartending but the hours are not much to be desired!
On a side note I have been thinking about my actions and feelings lately. It has made me think a bit more about how I handle my life and decisions. I have spent so much time trying to appease everyone, seeking some sense of gratitude or appreciation. I feel like I have lost a sense in trying to make myself happy. I over achieve, I try to help too much, and then I feel upset because no one says Thanks so much! or The place looks great...or maybe my effort will show how much I care and they return the effort back. It hasn't been working, so clearly I am not satisfied with it. My solution, and the obvious way normal people go about it, is to be more selfish. Stop caring about trying to "impress" or get some sort of thanks, do things for you. Go out of your way to make yourself feel better and you will not be let down in the long run.
I have been thinking about all this lately, and fitness, nutriton, mental alike, its relevant to health and happiness. You create and destroy your own well being and happiness, so take care of it.
That is all.
Goals for the rest of the year...up and perfect my Olympic Lift maxes, and eventually compete in Figure. When my size is right of course. Til then.
Faretheewell.
